You ever play that stupid game where you buy three random things at the market and see if you can get the clerk to react with a disgusted look or a giggle? We would buy zucchinis, condoms and a jar of mayo or whipped cream, lube and a bunch of balloons (what, we were easily amused).
I haven’t done that in years, possibly over a decade. When I realized I accidentally played the game last night (we should have given it some cool name, but I still can’t think of one). I finally got a reaction from the clerk, although this time I wasn’t trying. I laid down a bottle of bleach, a Tupperware container and a pregnancy test. I got a really weird look and suddenly felt really judged; it wasn’t like I was buying wire hangers with the pregnancy test. I didn’t want to jump the gun after all. I guess altogether it might have looked a little on the strange side. I'm pretty sure it was the Tupperware that put it over the top.
Thankfully, I failed the test. I can happily look forward to once again peeing on a stick, sweating for two minutes and praying to God that I will change my ways if only the test comes back negative, before seeing a negative sign and going out and having unprotected sex to celebrate.
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4 comments:
I had to buy cat food, batteries, and a box of Velveeta shells and cheese.
Ok, I didn't have to buy the shells and cheese. Somehow I thought it would make the cat food and batteries seem less weird.
I don't think it did.
I have never played that game before, but I am so going to now.
I played that game one time on accident when I had some intensive diarrhea.it was an emergency and the closest place was 7/11 and all they had was this green bottle labeled anti-diarrhea med really big on the side. I tried really hard to explain to the guy that it wasn't for me. he didn't buy it just offered me a brown paper bag instead of the usual plastic ones...I should have thrown in a box of condoms just to throw him off...
Ok, why have we never played this game before?!
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